Her ex wasn't dead, just unavailable

She invited me to a candlelit board-game cafe for our first date. As a guy who owns exactly one deck of cards, I was ready to be taught something. She brought a spirit board. I asked if this was the game. She said we needed permission from her ex before pursuing a connection. I carefully said I was sorry for her loss. "He's not dead," she said. "He's on a silent retreat." Apparently this was her workaround for his request not to be contacted. She placed my fingers on the pointer and asked whether he approved of me. It moved to NO while she made intense eye contact with my hands. Then the board requested that I buy her dessert. I pointed out that her ex probably wouldn't spell cheesecake with three E's in a row. She said the spirit world had different grammar. I paid for my coffee and left. Outside, she called after me that the universe wanted me to cover her parking. Even the universe was getting a separate check.