He brought scissors for our grand opening

He said he'd planned a little surprise for our first date. As a woman who's received enough unsolicited magic tricks, I braced myself. He pulled out a ribbon and giant ceremonial scissors. Before we entered the cafe, he stretched the ribbon across the door and asked a stranger to announce us. People were trying to leave. He told them we were “moments away from making history.” I made him move. Inside, he tied another ribbon around the bread basket. Apparently we couldn't eat until I said a few words about our shared vision. My vision was a roll. When I went to the restroom, he followed just far enough to ask whether I wanted that opening documented too. I told him I was leaving. He looked crushed, then reached into his bag and pulled out a tiny shovel. “For breaking new ground on separate journeys,” he explained. I've never dumped a guy and immediately been offered infrastructure.