His apology had its own little chair

I thought he was joking when he said he was bringing someone who helped him communicate. I'm a woman who has survived enough first dates to appreciate a heads-up, so I asked if he meant an interpreter. He meant a puppet named Craig. Craig had a tiny folding chair. Craig ordered my date's burger. When I asked my date what he did for fun, Craig said, "She asks a lot of questions." I told the actual human that I wasn't interested in being heckled over fries. He looked genuinely offended and said Craig was protective because of past relationships. Then he made the puppet knock my napkin onto the floor. I stood up. Suddenly the man was speaking beautifully without assistance. He said I was leaving before he could show vulnerability. I said he could start by apologizing. He slowly reached for Craig. "Without your attorney," I added. He texted afterward to say Craig thought we lacked chemistry. Incredible. Rejected by a sock with a LinkedIn voice.